Dream The Impossible Dream. Workplace Care, Your Mental Health, and You.

I once had a real job. 

You can laugh at this sentence, because that “real job” I had was when I was 22 years old, and I didn’t last long.  Let me tell you the story. 

When I was 22, right out of college, after having taken a year off to travel, I applied for and landed a job as a professional fundraiser for a national non-profit organization.  It was my first job in a professional workplace, and I was both thrilled and terrified.  I remember not really even having any idea of what a workplace should be like because up until that point I had only worked as a retail clerk, or in European workplaces—which I felt would probably be different.

And yes, they absolutely are.

During this year I was at my first job I had a boss who was beyond the pale of toxic behavior.  She demeaned what I wore, how I did my hair, and whether I was organized or not, she told me that I needed to do the job exactly like the last person—even though that person was never available to train me.  She went so far as to give me that person’s planner and told me to “just do what she did”.  With no training whatsoever.

Now this was in the early 2000s, and talk of toxic behavior in the workplace was uncommon.  There was no Glass Door to tell people that the boss regularly yelled at the staff so much that they cried.  Or that she provided literally no training to enable people to do their jobs to the best of their ability.

One day I was meeting with a volunteer at a fast-food restaurant, and she called the restaurant’s phone in order to speak to me and tell me how terrible of a job I was doing.  This was before cell phone numbers were commonly given out to bosses, unlike today, and I had to stand at the front desk of a Maid-Rite and listen to a woman call me names.  She was so loud the staff of the restaurant heard her.  They took care of my bill and told me that I didn’t deserve to be treated that way.  I cried, and they were right. 

After this Maid-Rite debacle, I went back to the office, threw the keys at my boss, and quit on the spot.  And with that moment, came a core belief for me.  I was not a good employee.  And this was a story I kept with me for literally decades as I shuffled from restaurant work to yoga teaching, to eventually yoga therapy and studio ownership.

It was a story I told myself when I quit my former toxic yoga studio work environment to strike out on my own for my business.  “I am the problem”, I said to myself, ignoring years of manipulation and lies told to me by my former employers. 

If only someone had stopped me in my tracks and told me that self-care extended to the workplace.

If only they had said, “Hey, if you make yourself and your mental health a priority—even at work; you will be able to clock situations where you are being treated poorly more quickly, set up boundaries that are healing and beneficial to you, and alert you to times when you need to walk away from situations that make you feel bad”.

So let me do that for you.

Self-care at work is a thing.  We call it Workplace Care here.  Let me cover the basics.

Personal Care at the Workplace.

Personal care is what most people think about when referring to “self-care”.  It is the little activities that we do to feel better in our bodies, emotions, and brains.  While it isn’t usually appropriate for you to go get a massage at the spa or curl up with a good book and a cup of tea during your workday, there are things you can do to support your body and brain care during your 9-5.  Here are our three favorite tips.

1.       Take breaks from sitting. 

This one is critical for keeping a happy and healthy back and hips.  You’ve got to get up to move every 55 minutes, so set a timer, and when that timer goes off—you stand and move.  Take a walk down the hall, a trip around your house, or even a quick stroll down the block—weather permitting. 

2.       Hydrate.

Drink your water.  I know that the recommended water consumption is 64 oz of water a day, but even if you start with a goal for half of that, you would be off to a great start.  Begin your day by drinking a glass of water, and keep that up throughout the day.  Your skin, energy, and muscles will thank you for it.

3.       3 minutes of meditation. 

So many people talk about their brain keeping them awake at night, and quick meditations during the day can often provide a solution.  Grab an app like Calm, our favorite, brain.fm, and take 3-5 minutes to meditate.  Sit quietly, focus on your breath, and allow your brain to shut down and catch up.  Your nighttime routine will thank you for it.

Relationship Care At Work.

Caring for your workplace relationships is something that a lot of people never think about unless those relationships are bad. The co-worker who steals your ideas, the boss (like my former bosses) who is toxic and manipulative, the desk mate who just won’t stop talking.

However, being intentional and deliberate about how you treat your workplace relationships can make your experience at work so much more nourishing and satisfying.  As we discussed in the last blog, workplaces are often a source of meaning and purpose in our lives, and making sure our co-workers are placed in the appropriate garden bed spots (see this blog) is crucial.

What to do when you’ve got a co-worker who requires more attention than they need or deserve?  We often use the bartender analogy for this scenario.  You are a bartender serving up your time, energy, and attention.  If someone takes too much of those resources, you need to consider that they might be drunk on your attention.  Slow their service.

Bartenders have this really magnificent way of looking through someone who has had too much to drink.  That person can be waving an empty cup at them for 30 full minutes and the bartender will never “see” it.  You can do this with your co-workers.  Don’t take the attention-seeking bait they are laying out for you, and get back to your own projects.  Often, without even a conversation, the person will get the message.  Then after an appropriate period of time has passed, you can check on them and give them some time to share their stories or frustrations.  The crucial part is that they are on your terms—you are not on theirs.

Work relationships do offer a unique window into making friendships with people who we might have otherwise never met.  Don’t ignore those relationships, or consider them less than others, the power of these “weak-tie” relationships has sparked revolutions.

Your environment at work.

As best as you can, we want to encourage you to not ignore your environment at work.  While you don’t have to make your workspace Instagram-worthy, we do think adding personal touches, items that make you feel nourished and cared for, as well as some things that will remind you to drink water and take breaks will do wonders for your mood. 

Work represents approximately 1/3 of our lives.  It takes up too much time and it is too important for us to shut our self-care brains off entirely during that time.

Consider the parts of work that you can lean into caring more for yourself during, and grab our guide 7 Tips To Get A Happy Body & Mind @ Work here.